Mustard and my beard
About 5 years ago I stopped off for a quick lunch (or so I thought). I had a hotdog with mustard and onions. As I was eating, a dollop of mustard fell into my beard, which was even longer than it is now. So I tried not to make a fuss about it and gingerly got a napkin and tried to wipe it off. It spread and I saw I had a nice yellow spot that was now one with my beard. The waitress (God bless ...her heart) was trying not to laugh and kept looking down at the floor when ever she walked by me. I got up and walked over to the server and asked her where the rest room was. She looked up to answer my question and her right eye brow when way up, and strange to say, did not go back down. She waited a few seconds and pointed me out the front door to the left across the way. So I said thanks and as I was leaving, it was then as I went out the door that they all started to laugh. It was a buttercrumped day.
So I went into the rest room and applied water and soap to my beard. Afterward I found that now, my whole beard was a very pretty light yellow, evenly spread over each and every facial hair, though my mustache was untouched, which made it worse I guess. If had some mustard on hand I would have applied it….might as well have everything color coordinated, it is all about style I am told.
I could not believe it, just one hot dog and a tad of mustard and now this. I had to go back in to pay for my lunch so I got one of those looks that tried to say that everything is ok. Sort of like someone when drunk tries to walk straight across the room....no one is fooled of course....sober people don't walk like that....so I went in and paid my bill and as I left, I turned and said that I like the new look. I might as well join them in the humor. I find myself strangely easy to laugh at. Then everyone started laughing. I got home and no one saw me as I raced to the shower to get my beard clean. I still love mustard by the way but more cautious when eating, who wouldn’t be?
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